You can stop wishing you were better
In the past week alone, 2 clients have confessed to me in hushed tones that they think they are broken. These are smart, talented, award winning, high earning clients. These are people that have bright shiny exteriors and are making all of their friends on Facebook & Instagram jealous. Yet they think they are broken, and spend a good part of their days wishing they were better.
They were very surprised to hear that I’m totally cool with being flawed. This inspired me to create a Five Reasons to Knock Off Wishing You Were Better list.
Five Reasons to Knock Off Wishing You Were Better
Being better won’t make you feel have less fear of judgment and rejection. In fact the higher you rise, the greater the imposter syndrome. If you ask the incoming freshman at Stanford how many of them think the admissions committee made a mistake on their application, 80% of the students’ hands shoot up.
You are hiding the awesome you already are. By focusing on improving what you are terrible at, you give yourself less time to polish your special gifts. I am terrible at proofreading. Hysterically bad at proofreading. I once almost sent out a newsletter with the word pubic instead of public. I guarantee that spell check laughs at me every time I sit down to write something. If I obsessed over getting everything right myself, I would never have time to read they million newsletters I read where I find cool tidbits like the Stanford stat in # 1.
There are very few things you can break that can’t be fixed. I somehow broke my website this week.
In case you are wondering, I do not sell oak flooring.
My hosting company assures me it will be fixed by Monday. I let them be good at what they are good at and continue on my gig. I’m coaching and writing and speaking, and hopefully, they are coding and host transferring and generally doing whatever magic it is that they do.
4. When I let myself be imperfect I give other people space to be their imperfect selves too. This is a gift. I’m coaching all the time these days and one of my mini session clients told me, “It’s so nice to talk to someone who is not judgemental.” I agree.
5. How you think you will feel when you are “better” is available to you right now. Really. I promise you. And feeling better now will get you where you want to be faster. Maybe this sounds too good to be true…
You may be thinking that you are a hot mess and I don’t understand or that what I’m saying sounds too optimistic. If you are feeling this way, let’s hop on a call and see if we can change that (because I bet you are already awesome even if you don’t know it yet).